**UPDATE**

well, i just got an email from our agency. they just received our acceptance docs back from authentication today. our attorney should have them this week & will then begin translation and legalization. i feel relieved to just hear SOMETHING. although good news is always better than bad news. bring on the good news.

Happy Anniversary.

this post is for michael.

today is our 5th wedding anniversary. i can not believe it's been 5 years since that day . . . this year it has officially been 10 years since we first met. wierd. i honestly feel like the luckiest woman in the whole world. you are the most amazing husband i could have ever hoped for. of course i give you a hard time about things (throwing your clothes on the floor, taking out the garbage, etc.) but i want you to know that i DO KNOW how lucky i am to have you. i love you even more today than i did on the day we were married. you know everything about me and you still love me just the way i am. These are just a FEW of the little things that i love about you :

• your eyes when you smile
• your laugh when i tickle you
• the way you snuggle in the morning
• your hands
• how you love to cook
• the way you throw yourself into the things you love
• your trust and your faith
• the way you are open and welcoming to everyone and anyone
• the way you hold me when i cry
• that you are doing exactly what you want to with your life

the list could go on and on because all the little things are what make you, YOU. you are my husband, my lover, my best friend, my partner. thank you for marrying me. thank you for putting up with me. thank you for loving me. but most of all, thank you for being you. you are going to be the best daddy ever.

we love you SO MUCH - with all of our hearts. Nat & Stella & Meg

Denver.

i just got back last night from Denver. went to see my Jilli. we had grand plans of running in the half marathon on colfax ave . . . but with Jill's knee and my blisters it just didn't work out this year. however, we did get lots accomplished. shopping for items for Jill's wedding in September. i miss her so much! we lived together all through college and haven't lived in the same state since, but she is still my other half. we can still finish each others sentences and sometimes know what the other is thinking. we are wierd, what can I say. it's funny how i miss the little things the most . . . like just having lunch together or going for a run or watching a movie . . . i want Stella to know her and love her like i do. guess we'll be traveling alot.

Today.

Well, today my agency will receive our acceptance docs in the mail. Today, everything officially begins. Our actual journey to bring Stella home. It seems so sureal. She feels so much like ours, to Michael and to myself, yet we've never seen her in person . . . we've never held her . . . we've never seen her smile . . . we don't know who holds her when she cries. I want to be that person. I need to be that person. I am her mom. I'm struggling today to adjust to all this recent news. I think I was almost in shock before. Today, everything is starting to sink in. We have a daughter. I am a mom. How wierd!!! We have SO much to do to get ready still! I've already painted her room and we have her dressers, but that's it as far as room prep goes. My mom & I did go shopping for a few summer clothes for next year. We still need a crib, which Michael is making, and we still need to decorate her room. I have 2 friends from SC coming in June to give me a shower at my mom's house! I am SO SO SO excited! I am SO lucky to have friends who love me enough to fly all the way out here for this : the ones giving the shower and the ones making the trip to attend. They all mean more to me than they will ever know. They have each played their own part in helping me through the past 3 years of infertility. I know they are all lifelong friends and can't wait to meet Stella!

Note to self . . .

never go to the post office at 830 am. i waited in line this morning for 45 minutes to mail our acceptance documents to our agency. it took me less time to apply for my passport. that just seems totally backwards to me.

Stella.

here she is. Estella. she is completely asleep in all the photos we received at referral, but in one very fuzzy one we can see that she has a dimple! we went through all the acceptance docs last night and i've been filling in all the blanks on the forms today. we are meeting with our 2 witnesses and the notary this afternoon then will head to get the state seals right after. hopefully we will have our acceptance docs in by tomorrow. our agency tells us the AVERAGE wait time from when our acceptance docs are received in Guatemala until pick up is 8-9 months. we are hopeful (just like EVERY other waiting family) that our wait will be shorter, but noone knows what will happen. every journey is different. Stella, we already love you with all our hearts and can't wait to meet you in person. We will be there before you know it!

who we are . . .

i am an obsessive compulsive 28 year old designer/infertile/new mom. my husband, michael, is a 29 year old architect/designer/new dad. he and a close friend of ours just started their own design firm, which i also work out of [you should go check it out www.theworkshop308.com]. we are the first TWO of the blog title. our gorgeous daughter is the THREE, and our English Bulldog (Meghan Penelope) is the 1/2. I feel like our lives are COMPLETELY insane right now. we moved from South Carolina to Missouri a little over a year ago and started the adoption process a few months after our move. then, we bought a 1950 house a few months after that which we now live in & are in the process of renovating. THEN, on top of all that, my husband started the new business. we are having a TOTAL blast working for ourselves, but i have to say it is SUCH hard work. we work ALL the time, but we are hoping it will all pay off in the long run. the (part 2): part 1 was our infertility treatments, this (the adoption) is part 2. i am SO loving part 2! i just keep staring at her face. michael & i both do! i am usually so prepared for things, and this feeling i was just completely NOT prepared for! but i'm loving it, i just hope i can hold myself together for the next several months until we get to pick her up . . . to be continued . . .

and it begins.

yesterday afternoon i got the news. we have a daughter in guatemala. i had not anticipated feeling what i feel when i received this news. i honestly expected to feel nothing really. don't get me wrong, i did expect to be excited, but i didn't expect to feel attached already. we've been through so much already - trying to start a family - that ever since we started this adoption process last year i've told myself 'i'll believe it when i see it.' well, now i've seen her and I WANT HER NOW! i'll be the first to tell you i am one of the most impatient people EVER . . . but i think i've been pretty damn patient about this entire thing. when we were going through all our infertility treatments i became an obsessive blog reader (lurker) on all the infertility blogs. then, when we started the guatamalan adoption i became an obsessive blog reader (lurker) on all the guatemalan adoption blogs. i think i chose to obsess over what's going on in their cases rather than what was (or wasn't) going on in our case. so, today (apparently) is my day of de-lurking on some of those blogs. it is so amazing to read about the experiences they have had thus far and i'm sure their stories will continue to be the source of my sanity over the coming months of WAITING.